There was a cucumber, a pickle, and a p***s sitting around talking about how their lives sucked. The cucumber complains, "Man, my life sucks.

When I get big, fat, and juicy, they cut me up and stick me on a salad." The pickle looked at him and said, "You think you have it bad? When I get big, fat, and juicy, they drown me in vinegar, put spices on me, and stick me in a jar.

" The p***s finally looks at them both and says, "You think you two have it rough? When I get big, fat, and juicy, they put a rubber tarp over my head, stick me in a dark room, and bang my head against the wall until I throw up and pass out!"