A newlywed couple hasnt had sex since their honeymoon 2 months ago. The woman, frustrated, goes to a marriage councilor to solve her problems. The councilor tells her to buy 7 different types of lingerie and wear one new one each day for the next week, if nothing happens, come back.

So the woman goes and buys all kinds of sexy clothes, lace, leather, silk, etc.

and wears one a night for a week, and nothing happens. She goes back to the councilor and tells her sad story to him.

The councilor says, "Take this box home, read the directions and do what they say". The woman gets home that night, anxious to see whats in the box. As she opens it she realizes that it is a big purple p***s.

The directions are very simple, turn on the purple p***s and tell it what to do. Confused, the woman tries it. "Purple p***s f**k me" she says, and the purple p***s starts giving her the best sex she has ever had. Twenty minutes later, after 3 orgasms, her husband walks in. Furious from what he sees, he pulls out the purple p***s and throws it on the bed next to them and screams "PURPLE P***S MY ASS!!"